The 10 Biggest Asshole Bosses in Gaming – Part 5
6: Cowboys From Hell(Guitar Hero)
Yo, fuck Pantera.
This fucking song is singlehandedly the reason I can’t say I’ve beaten Guitar Hero on Expert. Every other song, even the boring ones (Like Undone by Helmet), complete and few under 4 stars. But I absolutely, positively CAN NOT (that’s right, I made the contraction an expansion) beat this fucking song. Really, the song as a whole isn’t too hard; it’s that fucking intro. nuhnuhnuhnuh nuhnuhnuhnuh nuhnuhnuhnuh NUHNUHNUH! If it wasn’t for this part the song would be a breeze. The intro wouldn’t even have to be that hard, they just made the decision to have it performed with hammer-ons. I’ve double, triple, quadruple checked the tabs for the intro on real guitar; it isn’t played with hammer-ons. The only thing I can figure is that they mistook “hammers on” for “hammer on”, and the original intention was for you to just randomly hit yourself with hammers, and no, I don’t think that theory is contrived and hard to believe. Several times I have chosen hitting myself with a hammer over playing Cowboys from Hell, and each time it’s slightly more pleasurable than actually playing the game.
Biggest Display of Dicketry:
The biggest display of dicketry in this case is certainly that it had to be a Pantera song. If I’m going to play a song over and over again until my hands contort into a shape not physically possible according to all known medical logic, I’d like it to not be about a bunch of hicks who like to pretend they’re tough gay icons.
