Earthworm Jim HD for XBLA: Fuck Yeah
As you may be aware, Earthworm Jim fucking rules. Although this is a truth that is always timely, it has become even more so recently, because a badass remake is being produced for XBLA by Gameloft. That’s right, THE Gameloft. The ones responsible for major hits like Paris Hilton’s Diamond Quest and Grey’s Anatomy: The Mobile Game! However, despite the fact that they cranked out a lot of unmistakable shit, they were also responsible for the pretty-great XBLA releases Prince of Persia Classic and Uno, so hopefully it won’t be too bad. Not many details have been released, but I can say this definitively: it’s pretty. Look at this:
The character and background models look fantastic, so I’m willing to ignore the poor redesign and shading used on the stick and the ground. Hopefully that’ll be cleaned up before it’s released, although I’m pretty sure it won’t be. Who the fuck cares, I’m going to buy it regardless of its sticks.
The only problem I have with this release is that I was not personally informed. I bought all the action figures, for Christ’s sake. It’s the least they could do.
Duke Nukem 3D Releases on XBLA Wednesday
And I think they should call it Duke Nukem Forever.
Basically I’m just updating about this to posit my theory that George Broussard is actually dead. I believe he died in 1996, soon after the release of Duke Nukem 3D. He was judged by his maker to go to Hell and be punished for the rest of eternity. Beelzebub, the Lord of the Flies, told Broussard “for your sins in the World of Man you shall be tortured for all time! Because you were so proud of your creation, your ‘video game’, you shall be forced to make Duke Nukem… FOREVER!”
Now George Broussard is stuck on a neverending cycle of creating an entire game from scratch, dropping the engine, recreating it from scratch, dropping the engine again, and so on and so forth for eternity.
SHOCKING Xbox Live Poll Results!
www.joystiq.com/2008/08/29/gamerpicks-xbox-live-rock-the-vote-polled-obama-ahead
I’ve got some breaking news for you fuckers. MTV, bastion of vital political information, did a completely scientific poll (they counted gamertags with pictures of the candidate) to see who was leading in the hearts of gamers. Amazingly, Barack Obama, the 47 year old Democratic candidate whose revolutionary use of the internet and other technological means to gain the support of young people across the country is actually BEATING John McCain, a 72 year old Republican who doesn’t seem to know what the internet is!
To discover how this impossible scenario could ever happen, I decided to take it TO THE STREETS.
Unfortunetly, no one was willing to dignify me with a response, so I’ve got nothing.
Ahem.
Did you guys see the Olympics? They were pretty cool.
